The Upgraded Version Of Your Parenting Tool Is Now Available For Download

One problem many well-meaning parents fall into is having and using only one rigid parenting method. While that method may have worked for your child once upon a time, your ways of managing and disciplining them will eventually fail, making you and your child frustrated.

Your tried and true parenting methods are no longer effective. But with a few carefully thought out tweaks, you can upgrade your favourite parenting tool without a system overhaul

Observe Defeat

When you begin to notice that your child is no longer responding to the thing that used to work so well for you, it’s time to look at your principles and methodologies. Ask yourself, “What is the most important principle that I want my child to learn? Has it changed in the last few years? What do I need to let go of? What needs an upgrade?”

Be Willing to Change and Experiment

Next, examine the methods you have used thus far. What here is no longer age-appropriate? Your child has changed. It’s time to change your methods. Think of what can change; what needs to go.

Time Outs 2.0

Some parents like to use time-outs as a form of discipline. And as children age, you can easily adjust the length of their time out. You can begin with a time-out chair in the corner and later on move the child to their bedroom for their time out. Time away from the people they love.

However, what if time-outs are no longer working?

Ask yourself, “what is the goal of time-out?” Initially, it was to get the child to stop inappropriate behaviour and/or calm themselves down. Time-outs need to evolve to help the child learn appropriate human interactions.

Does a bedroom work for teaching good people skills? Or is it filled with distractions that keep the child from thinking about what they did wrong?

Time-outs don’t work forever. Is it possible to use the principle of social exclusion in older children and teenagers? Or does the principle need to change?

If our teenager is bugging a younger sibling, social exclusion may look different than it did when they were younger. Maybe your teen doesn’t get to hang out with their friends until they begin to treat their younger sibling with kindness. This also covers the principle of reinforcing the positive behaviour you want to see it your child – respecting their sibling.

That’s just one way you can upgrade an old parenting method to make it work better for you and your child once again.

Recipe for Tool #14 :


  • One (or two) frustrated parents
  • A maturing child
  • An old parenting method that no longer works
  • A dose of creativity.

Step 1 – Step Back

When you notice your tried and true method is no longer producing the results it used to, take a step back.

Step 2 – Ponder your Principles

Ask yourself if the principle of the tool you are using has changed? Does it need an upgrade to meet your child’s increasing maturity?

Step 3 – Creative Thinking

Use your creativity to adjust your methodologies.

Step 4 – Experiment with Version 2.0, 2.1, 2.2, etc.

Test it out. Give it a week or two to test your upgraded method and see what the results are. Don’t be afraid to go back to step 3.

All parenting technique can and must be adjusted as your child matures. It’s unrealistic to think that something that worked when your child was three years old will work when she is thirteen. Rather than banging your head in frustration over a technique that no longer works, simple upgrade it.


HB is a roller coaster father, one minute he is ecstatic about his children, the next he wonders if life will ever get any better. A long standing member of the 'I yell at my kids' club, he writes with passion and an analytical mind. Dissecting and separating the nuanced strategies that make a good parent great. He experiments with parenting techniques on his 3 year old so you don't have to.

Latest posts by HB (see all)